By Martin Jumbam
This column focuses on the vocational experiences of priests and other religious, as they battled with the fears and doubts on whether the Consecrated Life was really what they were meant to do. In each edition, we shall feature one or more of our bishops, priests, and/or Reverend brothers and sisters. It is especially meant to encourage other young men and women who are meditating the Consecrated life but may not have someone to whom they can express their doubts and fears. As Fr Michael Kintang says in this interview, “…it is quite normal to be in doubt… but you must pray for guidance from the Lord.”
“I was touched right back in primary school”
Q: Father, when were you ordained a priest?
I was ordained on the 22nd of April 1981, in the St Joseph Cathedral in Bamenda, now the Metropolitan Cathedral.
Q: The way to the Priesthood is quite different for many people. When did you start having a feeling that maybe God was calling you into the Catholic priesthood?
I can say that it was right back when I was still in primary school and used to serve at Mass. There was the Parish Priest whom I used to admire during the Stations of the Cross and at other times as he moved up and down the church. So I started imitating him at home and would fashion out a cassock for myself using my mother’s loincloth.
So I started having love for the priesthood and God blessed me to get into St Augustine’s College where I joined the St Martin’s Society, a group formed to assist those who felt that they had a calling to the priesthood. But by the time I left St Augustine’s College it had already gone off my mind and I went to Yaoundé. There I worked in Dr Dan Lantum's bookshop and his plan was to send me to pursue studies in Bookshop Management, but I kept feeling that I was in the wrong place and one day I picked up the courage to tell him that even though he had this plan for me, I did not feel that it was good for me.
I went to the Rector of the seminary in Nkolbissong and told him of my feelings and that I would like to come to the Major Seminary in Yaoundé. He asked me to go to my local Ordinary, Bishop Paul Verdzekov - that was in 1971. Bishop Paul advised me to do two years in Bishop Rogan College, which I did and in 1974 the staff there recommended me for the Major Seminary, where I continued until in 1981 when was I called to the Altar and ordained a priest.
Q: During your seminary studies, did you ever have moments when you were plagued with doubts, wondering if you were doing the right thing, maybe asking yourself if you were really hearing the Call right?
Of course, it was quite naturally. We had our Rector at the time, now Christian Cardinal Tumi, who was a very straightforward man. There were times when he was very hard on us and demanding and I would wonder if that was really what I was planning to get into. But now when I look back, I thank God that I had him as Rector because the training he gave us equipped us well for the priestly duties that are expected of us.
Q: Where there moments during your training days when you had to seek counselling from your Rector?
That was quite ordinary in the seminary. In fact, every seminarian, from time to time, had to meet with the Rector and discuss the problems that were bothering him. The Rector would talk with you as a father and would counsel you, and make you understand that there was no condition in life where you have everything. That what really counts is faith, hope and love. Those are three things that last and they are three things that carry you through the inevitable difficult moments that you must encounter in life: Hope that carries you on; Light of Faith that helps you to go on; and Love that always allows you to push on despite the difficulties.
Q: But was there never a moment when you felt that you could not continue; when you felt like just giving it up and going somewhere else?
Actually there was a day when I had a misunderstanding with the Rector - right in the students' refectory - and I actually felt that maybe I was not wanted here, but later on when I went to him and apologised, the way he welcomed me I knew that I had been wrong to feel that way.
Q: There are many young people out there who are having a feeling that they are being called to the priesthood but are not quite sure about it. What advice would you give to such young people?
Well, I remember clearly what Bishop Paul told me when I too went to him with the same problem. He said, "Look, I want you to go Bishop Rogan College and there you will understand if God is calling you or not. Just go there and put yourself in the hands of the Lord, who says: "I chose you, it was not your choice…" So every day when I jumped out of bed I said; "Lord it is your wish, and if it isn’t, show me the way out of it…"
I would like to tell such young people to have no fear and to take the path, the Lord will do the rest and show them if it is the right one for them or not. Very often, we think that we are alone but I say no. When you read Romans 7: 4, you hear St Paul is wondering out loud what is going to redeem him from his wretched nature. But we should always remember that we are only instruments in the hands of God and the only way to be good instruments is through humility. God is there to take us through the difficult times and it is only through his grace that we can become what we are really meant to be. To achieve this, we must be very committed to our prayer lives.
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